Thursday, November 25, 2010


What kid wants candles on a watermelon?

My daughter recently told me that there was nothing I could do that would surprise her. 


  • What if I left to do a Walkabout with the Aborigines? 
  • Became a groupie following Justin Bieber, Mylie Cyrus or Barry Manilow?
  • Ran for Senate?
  • Changed my name to Rolf?
  • Trained for a marathon and ate healthily?
  • Started skydiving, extreme motocross or cockfighting?
  • Joined the Merchant Marine?
  • Paid a homeless man to pose as a wealthy tycoon named Rex Sterling.  Then had "Sexy Rexy" con and seduce my arch enemy?
  • Began watching popular stuff like: the Bachelor, Cougar Town or Sports?
  • Embarked on a career as any of the following:  policewoman, monster truck driver, baby seal hunter, contractor, slaughterhouse employee, bus, truck or cab driver, manager,  pilot, mathematician, CEO, surgeon,  accountant, engineer,  the list goes on and on...
  • Underwent plastic surgery to change my identity and look like David Hasselhoff.
Nope, I tried it all, and she's still not shocked by anything I do. 
I wonder how she will feel when I tell her I found her in a dumpster at my prom? 

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