Sunday, October 31, 2010

GoOD IdEa GoNE BaD

Have you ever thought it would be a good idea to dress up as a ghost, hide in a small room and wait for someone to come in so you could scare her.......

~THEN~

....that person's bloodcurdling scream laced with obscenities scared you so bad that you kind of wet your pants?

Scariest Moment of Your Life
Yeah...um....neither have I.   I was just askin'.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Do You Ever Wish You Had a Clone?






Sometimes (especially when I'm really busy) I wish I had a clone.  The possibilities are endless.  My clone could be getting her hair done while I'm at the bank.  Or while I'm scrubbing toilets she could be at Foxwoods gambling.  When I'm at the grocery store, my clone could be cozily curled up on the couch in a fetal position, crying with a self-help book in her hand.  Maybe she'd want to cuddle my dog Bailey while I argue with my husband.

I wonder if my clone and I would argue much.  We'd likely argue over which one of us is more special or fancier than the other.

It would be painful to watch her make the same mistakes I make or see her eating chips and Halloween candy for breakfast and lunch every day.

A lot to ponder....I was thinking about all this while driving to the grocery store this morning. Then, being distracted (deep in thought) I kind of almost hit someone.  My clone could have alerted me if we were together.  No, she'd probably be at home doing something really exciting.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Fall: A Time for Letting Go

Autumn has always been my favorite time of year.  There are some, however, that struggle with Autumn because it is a reminder that Winter is near. Sadness comes over them when they see the falling leaves.  Actually Autumn is a journey toward life  The dead leaves are transformed by Winter snows and Spring rains into rich material for new growth.  The earth waits in this process of growth for the unknown and the unseen beauty of another season.  New growth of Spring cannot happen until Autumn lets go of what has been. The same is true in our lives.  We cannot grow without change.  The falling leaves are subtle reminders that we are asked to let go of many things in our lives.  It is a time for us to let go of whatever keeps us from growing. 

Fall's changing weather may prompt you to make changes....cashing in spare change, changing batteries in smoke detectors, undergoing a sex change operation.

You may need to to let go in other ways: 

Letting go of that husband with the wandering eye so that a hunky new man can come into your life.


Letting go of old outdated clothing styles you desperately cling to.



For me it is as simple as letting go of an old resentment.  Like maybe that time in second grade when Sister Amata came up from behind, grabbed me by the shoulders and shook the daylights out of me for no apparent reason. (That tiny ole battle ax was always yanking my chain.)




Autumn is a season of change and it reminds me that I am changing too.  Help me throw off those things that hold me down.  Help me understand I cannot live in summer forever.  I am made to change and this season is part of it.  Let me embrace this time of change, and become something new.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Your Dog's Right to Choose

I think it's nice to let your dog choose what Halloween costume he's going to wear.  My dog has his very own Halloween box filled to the brim with fanciful costumes! He invariably pulls out his favorite, a plush yellow and black bumble bee costume with shiny silver wings. It just so happens to be the softest and most luxurious one of the bunch!

Bailey loves all the attention he gets when he's dolled up, and knows there will be a fun day ahead!
You can catch him buzzing up to the pumpkin patch to feast on hot dogs, fries and orange soda. After a photo shoot in front of some mums and pumpkins,  he loves to  pop his bumble bee head out the window on a Fall leaf-peeping drive.
My little Howl-oweener



I let my dog make choices in other areas in his life as well...

"Bailey, do you want to be quiet right now?  No?  You want to keep howling?  OK!  Howl all you want. It's good to let your emotions out.  It's safe. This house is a cry friendly zone!"

"Would you like to stop growling and biting?  No?  I know, it's fun to play and I want you to have a happy life.  Oh, I see.....you're angry.  My mistake.  Well, it's good to get it out, not let it fester."

Do you think you might want to get down from there?
OK,  I see you're choosing not to.


Here's a question I often ask giving him two choices:
"Are you my friend...or are you my friend?"
Silence....
"Well, I guess you are my friend then!"



Mon Ami


Friday, October 15, 2010

MY X-TREME SPORTS

I am not into extreme sports (or any sports for that matter) unless you call decorating or gardening a sport.  In those cases I LOVE taking it to the X-TREME. I'm a high endurance athlete who loves living on the edge.

An X-treme sport  is a popular term for certain activities perceived as having a high level of inherent danger, and that are counter-cultural. These activities often involve speed, height, a high level of physical exertion, and highly specialized gear or spectacular stunts. A feature of such activities in the view of some is their alleged capacity to induce an adrenaline rush in participants.

I'm out there in my gardening gloves, slammin' some Mountain Dew, free styling past the yellow jacket nest in the flower garden.  Next I'm in a helmet, repelling off the side of my house, tying a bat, a ghost and some cobwebs off the highest corners.
My X-treme Sports Combined
I have been decorating since late September. Hope my endurance
holds out until Halloween.  I'm up for the challenge, though.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

HALLOWEEN DECORATING / Creepy Cloth~revisited

CREEPY CLOTH:  Beautiful but dangerous


In the previous post, we discussed the wonders and many uses of creepy cloth.  But I feel that it's only fair to let you know some of the pitfalls and dangers of this strange and wondrous weave.



Yesterday as I was decorating, I was standing on a chair that was wrapped in Creepy Cloth.  When I stepped down to get off the chair, my foot became entangled in the web-like material.  I tripped and almost tumbled off the chair.  Later, I stood on the same chair (thinking I'd be extra careful this time) and it happened again!  I was ensnared.  I could have fallen and gashed my head on the stone fireplace!




A few minutes later, for some strange reason, my house-trained dog of 11 years decided to lift his leg on the creepy cloth I had draped over a table.

"I guess every rose has its thorn."     Poison
Was my faithful friend trying to exact revenge on this mysterious cloth?


We want our decorations to be scary but this is not the kind of fright we are looking for!

How can something so glorious be so deadly?

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

HALLOWEEN DECORATING

My new find:  CREEPY CLOTH


For me, this is the year of the Creepy Cloth.  I just can't say enough about it.  It's creepy, it's clothy and it hides a multitude of sins. Sometimes known as Forbidden Fabric or Trickster Trap, it comes in spooky shades of gray, beige, and black.  I put it everywhere, over tables, chairs, windows....just about anything!



 Try it!  I think you'll agree that you can't get enough of it's creepy clothiness!!!!

Creepy Cloth...it's a lifestyle.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Tip of the Day: Don't Be Impulsive

It is never good to be impulsive.

Let me give you an example:  This is purely hypothetical, mind you.  Let's just say a certain someone suggested you write a blog, so you did.  On impulse, in a moment of crazy hilarity you posted it for all the world to see.  Later (after a good night's sleep) you decided that you probably should have given it more thought.  But it was too late, the deed was done.

~PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE.~


(Hope you enjoyed this tip and the accompanying hypothetical example. Sure, I could have given you an example of some impulsive thing I've done in my life, but I think this hypothetical one is good enough. You get the idea.)

Monday, October 11, 2010

What are your dreams trying to tell you?

I am an expert on dream interpretation. Have you ever wondered what your dreams mean?

MY DREAM:
Last night I had a dream about Jacob of Twilight fame.  He asked me if I had any "roids."  I replied, "The only 'roids' I have are hemorrhoids."

MY INTERPRETATION:
Since hemorrhoids are the varicose veins of the rectum, one interpretation of this dream would be....I am about to experience something painful and embarrassing in my life.  Another interpretation would be........ I am just a pain in the a@# with a ripped, young lover who is a wolf.